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Thursday, May 4, 2017

A synoptic history of the separation of church and state: Our first update for 2017!

(And it's a doozy!):We update this history today for the first time since 2015 when  Jeb! Bush, who almost – but not quite – reclaimed some Kennedy territory. But p3 First Amendment fans ain't seen nothin'  yet!

(NOTE: This timeline was originally published in shorter form in 2009, driven by the somewhat-naive thoug ht that the time that then the process of theocratic overreach in the US was probably already at or near its zenith. Now it appears that p3 must stand ready for further revisions from time to time, as the exigencies of Republican electoral politics require it. We welcome the task.)

1791 James MadisonCongress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.

1802 Thomas Jefferson: The Establishment Clause of the First Amendment guarantees Americans a wall of separation between church and state.

1954 Dwight Eisenhower: The separation of church and state surely won't be hurt by adding "under God" to The Pledge of Allegiance in the name of anti-Communism, will it?

1960 John F. Kennedy: The separation of church and state is absolute. My church will not dictate my policy decisions.

2008 Mitt Romney: The separation of church and state is relative. My church will dictate my policy decisions, but only to the extent that I will discriminate against the same people Christian conservatives would already be discriminating against anyway.

2009 Bart Stupack: The separation of church and state is a fairy tale. My church will show up at the Capitol steps in a limo to dictate policy.

2012 Rick Santorum: The separation of church and state is an abomination. "Earlier in my political career, I had the opportunity to read the speech [by JFK to the Greater Houston Ministerial Association in 1960], and I almost threw up."

2012 Sally Quinn: The separation of church and state is impossible. “This is a religious country. Part of claiming your citizenship is claiming a belief in God, even if you are not Christian.” Agnostics, atheists, and other nonbelievers need not apply.

2014 Rick Santorum (again): The very notion of the separation of church and state is "a Communist idea that has no place in America."

2015 Fifty-seven percent of surveyed Republicans: The separation of church and state is sacreligious, since the U.S. Constitution is a document inspired by Our Lord Jesus Christ, so it counts as Holy Scripture.

2015 Rand Paul, libertarian-of-convenience:  The separation of church and state is a one-way street: "The First Amendment says keep government out of religion. It doesn't say keep religion out of government."

2015 Jeb Bush, "moderate" GOP presidential candidate: The separation of church and state is nothing more than a "game" of "political correctness."

2015 Bobby Jindal, 2016 vice-presidential hopeful (and staunch opponent of executive orders, when it's Obama, who not that long ago told fellow Republicans they had to stop being "the party of stupid"): The separation of church and state can be disposed of by simple executive order from the governor, even after the GOP-controlled state legislature killed the same anti-LGBT bill the week before.

2015 Jeb Bush (again), apparently ignoring his promise of roughly six weeks earlier (see above) that his Catholic faith would naturally influence how he governed as president: "I don’t get economic policy from my bishops or my cardinals or my pope," adding "I think religion ought to be about making us better as people, less about things [that] end up getting into the political realm.”

Ooh! So close to what JFK promised in 1960 (also above) – so close! Except that Kennedy pledged that the church would not dictate his policy decisions – Period. Full stop. – whereas Jeb only pledges that the church won't dictate his economic decisions. This means that, as both a good Cafeteria Catholic and a Republican candidate who must pander to his base to make it through the primaries alive, he feels free to ignore anything he doesn't like that the Pope says about matters like climate change, economic inequality, privatizing Social Security, or similar things that could make a difference to his donors' bottom line.

But, of course, he considers himself totally free to invoke his faith in the name of being anti-choice and anti-contraception, to say nothing of attempting to use the Florida National Guard to cruelly prolong the life of Terri Schiavo. (You didn't forget that one, did you?)

2017 45th President and widey-noted Christianity practitioner Donald J. Trump,signing his "Religious Liberty Executive Order" coinciding with National Prayer Day: "The order, which Trump inked during a ceremony in the White House Rose Garden, directs the IRS to exercise "maximum enforcement discretion" over the Johnson amendment, which prevents churches and other tax-exempt religious organizations from endorsing or opposing political candidates. It also provides "regulatory relief" for organizations that object on religious grounds to a provision in Obamacare that mandates employers provide certain health services, including coverage for contraception."We will not allow people of faith to be targeted, bullied or silenced anymore," Trump proclaimed during his remarks.

Sunday, August 7, 2016

Sunday morning toons: Trump hasn't gone "off-message" – that is the message


Inviting Russian Intelligence to hack Hillary's email? Gold Star families? Joking about always having wanted a Purple Heart? Having mothers and their crying babies ejected from events? Those, as avant garde filmmakers used to say, are not mistakes; those are choices. (The bit about his wife possibly having violated immigration law when she first began working in the US as a model – that feels like a well-timed oppo research dump. The rest is Pure Trump.)

It's like an old Scholastic's riddle: Trump is so easily baited that he can't keep his mouth shut (or his thumbs off of Twitter) for even a full day at a time, and yet ever since he mocked John McCain's years at the Hanoi Hilton last winter, it's become clear that there's nothing he can say that will finally be too much for his base. So is there a point where the irresistable force of his yuge mouth finally meets the immovable object of some (so far theoretical) "at long last, sir, have you no decency?" boundary? I really don't know anymore.

One thing's for certain: He won't withdraw his name from the GOP ticket just because the party elites want him to. That's the way to make certain that he will never, ever quit.

I still think that, if he actually does bail before the election, it will be because he's somehow sensed he's about to lose. It's hard to believe him thinking that about himself, but it's also hard to tell how much of his bragging he actually believes. Instead, I stand by my prediction from early July: He'd claim that, simply by getting the nomination, he's made his point and accomplished what he set out to do and so there's no need to bother with the formality of a general election. And in fact, taking on the duties of the President of the United States would be a step down from simply being his awesome, classy self. (He said as much when he floated to Kasich the idea that, as VP, he could run the country while Trump focused on "making America great again.")

Or perhaps, as some observers claim, his insistence this week that the election is being "rigged" against him is simply Trump's way of covering his bets by mainstreaming a story that will make his loss in the general everyone's fault but his, which is the Broadway and 42nd Street of his comfort zone.

Of course, even in the wildly unlikely event that Trump were to drop out of the race, who would the Republican National Committee select to take his place on the ticket? One of the two dozen also-rans from this spring's GOP primaries, whose clock Trump so thoroughly cleaned? Mitt Romney? Ted "Last Candidate Standing" Cruz? Someone untested (and hence, unvetted)?



Today's toons were selected by the 168 members of the Republican National committee from the week's offerings at McClatchy DC, Cartoon Movement, Go Comics, Politico's Cartoon Gallery, Daryl Cagle's Political Cartoons, About.com, and other fine sources of toony goodness.


p3 Best of Show: Matt Davies.

p3 Legion of Merit: Steve Breen.

p3 Award for Best Adaptation from Another Medium: Steve Benson.

p3 Certificate of Harmonic Toon Convergence (Part 1): Robert Ariail and Darrin Bell.

p3 Certificte of Harmonic Toon Convergence (Part 2): Kim Warp and Nate Beeler. (Honorable mention: Clay Bennett.)
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*This piece by Mike Luckovich is also awarded the coveted Driftglass Legacy Award.

Ann Telnaes watches in awe as the Republicans stand by their man. You know what they say: Give a party enough necktie, and . . .

Mark Fiore promises that no animals were harmed in the making of this video about Trump's sacrifices – although be warned: the phrase "cleavage doesn't grow on trees, you know" does appear.


Tom Tomorrow identifies a recurrent (and quite persuasive) theme at the DNC – and also brings the first of an unlikely Bill O'Reilly trifecta of appearances in this week's p3 toon review.

Keith Knight serves up the second of three Bill O'Reilly-themed pieces this week (Matt Bors, below, is the third). BO really is a jerk, and it's never amiss to be reminded of it.

Although I vowed I wasn't going to go down the "Manchurian Candidate" road, Reuben Bolling does end up pretty much the same place I was headed, and he manages to make the Useful Idiot even more idiotic, which is no small achievement.

Carol Lay gives new life to "happily ever after."

Red Meat's Bug-Eyed Earl greets the day.


Although I like the art on a particular Jim Morin piece this week – I think he gives great elephant – Comic Strip of the Day does a more thorough job than I would have of explaining why idn't make the particular cut here at p3 although indirectly, of course, it did.

The Comic Curmudgeon brings up an interesting point: Ever since high school in the early 1960s, the output of Peter Parker's photojournalism "career" has consisted of selfies.


Vitaliky is Personaliky! I don't think I could find a better summary of "Vim, Vigor, and Vitaliky," directed in majestic monochrome by Dave Fleischer in 1936, than this log line from IMDB: "Popeye is running a women's gymnasium next door to Bluto's cabaret; seeing Popeye's greater success with women, he dresses in drag and challenges Popeye to various feats of strength," although that stops far short of capturing the essential weirdness of the piece. I thought it was weird when I was a kid, and I think so today. (Seven years later, Popeye got dressing-in-drag revenge on Bluto, in "Too Week to Work." If you're good, I'll dig it up for next week. Uncredited work by Jack Mercer (Popeye), Mae Questel (The Slender One), Gus Wickie (Bluto), and Sammy Timberg (musical director).




The Exalted Oregon Toon Block:

Ex-Oregonian Jack Ohman watches as one of our nation's highest awards is bestowed.

Documented Ex-Oregonian Jen Sorensen has her moment of reckoning at the DNC.

Matt Bors celebrates a blessed birth.

Jesse Springer isn't in love with a corporate tax increase to protect Oregon's public retirement system.



Test your toon-captioning kung fu at The New Yorker's weekly caption-the-cartoon contest. (Rules here.) And you can browse The New Yorker's cartoon gallery here.



Sunday, July 31, 2016

Sunday morning toons: Memorial binge-watching tributes, and other modern curiosities

If you didn't get farther than Hillary literally breaking a glass ceiling this week, you probably didn't make the cut. And the comparatively no-drama DNC convention probably made everyone's work a little harder: About the only conflict was generated by the Bernie Dead-Enders, and they're beginning to wear out their p3 welcome anyway.

No one – except for Tim Eagan, below – really seemed to have a good handle so far on the Trump-Putin connection as it's beginning to spill out into the daylight.


Today's toons were selected by the dreaded 13th Directorate of Moscow Center, from the week's offerings at McClatchy DC, Cartoon Movement, Go Comics, Politico's Cartoon Gallery, Daryl Cagle's Political Cartoons, About.com, and other fine sources of toony goodness.


p3 Best of Show: Jeff Danziger.

p3 Legion of Merit: Joel Pett.

p3 Certificate of Harmonic Toon Convergence: Marshall Ramsey and Mike Luckovich.

p3 Encryption Citation: Joe Heller. The inspiration for this one might have come quickly, but I bet that the actual execution must have taken a good deal more work than usual.


Ann Telnaes shares sketches from last week's Democratic National Convention.

Mark Fiore asks: When does a wild conspiracy theory stop being a wild conspiracy theory? When just enough evidence floats to the surface to make it sound like a plausible explanation. I'm not there yet, but it does suggest a theme for the general campaign: Trump 2016 – Keel Moose and Squirrel!


Tom Tomorrow re-caps the Republican National Convention, a key moment of which is Reince Priebus attack of melancolic nostalgia.

Keith Knight presents Biff, doing what you might have thought was impossible. Unless you're Bill O'Reilly.

Reuben Bolling brings us the latest edition of Super-Fun-Pak Comix, including the long-awaited (or, shortly anticipated, depending) adventures of Percival Dunwoody, Idiot Time Traveler from 1909.


Red Meat's Ted Johnson and Milkman Dan discover that American political discourse isn't broken after all.


Fans of the form lost two great talents last week: Richard Thompson, creator of Cul de Sac (he was 58), and Jack Davis, legendary Mad Magazine (and TV Guide cover, and lord knows what all else) artist (he was 91). Brian Fies served up a great two-part appreciation of Thompson at Comic Strip of the Day. And Mad honored its own, joining tributes by – oh hell, by two or three generations of artists who were influenced by his work: Just Google the keywords "jack davis tribute" and duck. One of the best birthday presents I ever got was the CD-ROM collection of every issue of Mad from 1952 to 1998. It's searchable, so I spent this week bingeing on Jack Davis features the way others were bingeing on "Stranger Things."


Charlie Redux: Last week the featured animation was "Little Orphan Airedale," the first WB short featuring Charlie Dog (note that, like Smokey Bear, he doesn't have a middle name), directed by Chuck Jones from a Tedd Pierce story in 1947. As I mentioned in passing, that was a reworking of " Porky's Pooch," directed in 1941 by Bob Clampett from a story by Warren Foster. Apart from the obvious differences (character names, Technicolor, etc.) the characters in Clampett's piece seem more like wind-up automatons next to the fully realized characters that Jones created six years later. About the only thing that carries over recognizably is Rover's (Charlie's) line: "You ain't got no dog, and I ain't got no master."




The Absolutely Fabulous Oregon Toon Block:

Ex-Oregonian Jack Ohman gets what we could hope to be the final word on the Bernie dead-enders. I tried to make a glass ceiling/glass wall joke out of this, but finally gave up.

Documented Ex-Oregonian Jen Sorensen brings it home for something we've often said around here at p3: When it comes to risk assessment, Americans are the worst.

Matt Bors submits this item for your approval.





Test your toon-captioning super powers at The New Yorker's weekly caption-the-cartoon contest. (Rules here.) And you can browse The New Yorker's cartoon gallery here.



Sunday, July 3, 2016

Sunday morning toons: You know your party's nominating convention is radioactive

(Wowsers! Greetings to everyone from Mike's Blog Round Up who stopped by! And thanks to Batocchio for helping the snake swallow the elephant!  But to get back on track: You know your party's nominating convention is radioactive . . . )

. . . when Ted Nugent begs off attending because of – get this! – his "intensive concert touring schedule." As Chandler Bing would say, could there be a more obviously implausible excuse? I think "intensive concert touring schedule" should be the "I'm washing my hair on Saturday night" of the twenty-first century. It has that same level of a disdain that can't even be bothered to sound believable. (And by the way, Ted: Nineteen seventy-seven called, and wants its shirt back.) Clay Jones has a suggestion, below, to fill the awkward silence at the podium.

On only distantly-related matters: It took years, and a lot of taxpayer money, and many shamelessly prodded connections – remember the bait shop in Hot Springs? the blue dress? Sidney Blumenthal? – but the nothingburger of the Whitewater investigation, intended to deligitimize the election of a Democratic president, finally uncovered a little nugget of political gold when it eventually led to Bill Clinton being questioned under oath about his extramarital affairs. (This, in turn, finally provided the grounds the GOP thought would justify impeachment, and it did – followed by Clinton's acquittal, his rise in the polls, the GOP losing a zillion seats in Congress, and Newt Gingrich's resignation in humiliation.)

And so, a generation later, after years, and a lot of taxpayer money, and many shamelessly prodded connections – remember Hillary's concussion? Susan Rice on Face the Nation? Sidney Blumenthal?* – the nothingburger that has been the Benghazi inquisition, intended to deligitimize a Democratic presidential frontrunner, refuses to die, due most recently by the unforced error by Bill Clinton and Attorney General Lynch. But god love Rep. Trey Gowdy and his committee: They're still out there looking for that nugget of gold. Ask Matt Davies, below.

(And here's a heads-up to Gowdy: Keep your calendar for 2036 open: Not even twenty years after resigning his congressional seat in disgrace, Newt Gingrich is being mentioned as a short-lister for the job of running mate with the most disliked presidential candidate in his lifetime.)

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*As far as I'm aware, this is the only known case of the use of Sidney Blumenthal to satisfy the Comedy Rule of Three.  I'm proud of this achievement.


Today's toons were selected by an elaborate vetting process including a 100-question form, and extensive review of tax records and public speeches and articles, from the week's offerings at McClatchy DC, Cartoon Movement, Go Comics, Politico's Cartoon Gallery, Daryl Cagle's Political Cartoons, About.com, and other fine sources of toony goodness.


p3 Best of Show: Jeff Danziger (although, as far as I know, neither he nor any other political cartoonist took me up on my generous offer).

p3 Legion of Merit: Tom Toles.

p3 Cross of Ghoul: Darrin Bell.

p3 Certificate of Harmonic Toon Convergence: Paul Szep and Michael Ramirez.

p3 "Sorry, but that's what we Time Lords call 'A fixed point in time'" Memo of Consolation: Phil Hands.


Ann Telnaes considers Boris Johnson's handling of Britain's exit from the EU to be nothing to sneeze at.

Mark Fiore says that Hillary-haters among congressional Republicans (but I repeat myself) are trying to raise the Albania question – you know: Shifty. Untrustable.



Keith Knight looks on in fear at the wrath of dog.

Reuben Bolling tells the story of the UK's blustery day.

Red Meat salutes that local electronics chain that's about more than just a battery club.


The Comic Curmudgeon yearns for "the days when a bird-man wearing saddle shoes and what appear to be purple leg warmers but no pants can have a frank, honest, and open discussion about his sex life in the newspaper." In context, it makes sense.

Comic Strip of the Day looks at the latest neverwozzer from the Benghazi inquisition and concludes, sadly, No, at long last, we have no sense of decency.


But the Black Knight 'as a fire-breathin' dragon! Incredibly, even after the Hunting Trilogy. "Rabbit of Seville," and "What's Opera, Doc?" it was a fairly minor piece, "Knighty Knight Bugs," directed in 1958 by Friz Freling, that finally won Bugs Bunny his one and only Oscar for Best Animated Short. And, as Wikipedia notes, "Knighty Knight Bugs" was to a considerable degree a retread of another face-off between Bugs and Yosemite Sam from 1954. Watch "Knighty Knight Bugs" at eBaum's World.


The Right-Sized Oregon Toon Block:

Ex-Oregonian Jack Ohman captures every kid's disappointment for this holiday weekend.

Documented Ex-Oregonian Jen Sorensen documents the process of the worst man in the world trying – desperately trying – to have his come-to-Jesus moment.

Matt Bors looks at the threat posed by a ubiquitous concealed-carry device.



Test your toon-captioning superpowers at The New Yorker's weekly caption-the-cartoon contest. (Rules here.) And you can browse The New Yorker's cartoon gallery here.



Monday, June 13, 2016

Monday evening Sunday toons: Chickens, meet roost


America is nearly bursting at the seams with those uncommonly angry minds that Richard Hofstadter wrote about over half a century ago.

When I commented to a friend a couple of days that I was tired of having every third post on my Facebook feed being a picture of Clinton, Sanders, or Trump, accompanied by some predictable, finger-pointing, pot-stirring prose, I simply meant I wished the Democratic convention would be over. It didn't occur to me that I would get my wish when one of the deadliest mass shootings in US history (certainly the deadliest in recent history, but the massacre at Wounded Knee in 1890, with around 300 deaths, is still in first place, and isn't it fun to argue this like fantasy league stats?) would bump all that out of the news cycle.

I was running late with this post Sunday evening anyway, and finally decided to take advantage of coverage of last night's mass murder at the gay nightclub in Orlando to note that multiple FBI investigations for terrorist-related activities plus a record of homophobic utterances and wife-beating didn't stop the shooter from buying a particularly nasty type of gun legally or obtaining a concealed-carry permit. And that's if "advantage" is the word I'm looking for – it certainly is the word that the short-fingered vulgarian was looking for.

Of course, deadline cartooning about an emotional topic doesn't always bring out the best work, but it was worth it to wait until this evening, giving artists time to get beyond weeping Statues of Liberty and such.

And let me point out the obvious once again, we are way, way past the point where "thoughts and prayers" are going to get you into heaven after armed lunatics in our violent country act out again. (Props: Mike Luckovich, below.) Hell, it's not even safe to be minding your own business in a zoo cage anymore. (Props: Joel Pett, below.)

Oh, and here's a reminder on a related topic: Sen. David Perdue, currently in the news defending himself for offering a prayer for the death of President Obama, is the cousin of former Georgia governor Sonny Perdue, and holds the Senate seat previously held by Saxby Chambliss, who rose to national attention in the 2002 campaign (when national security was also all the rage, so to speak) by attacking the patriotism of incumbent Sen. Max Cleland, who had lost three limbs during his service in Vietnam, during a war that Chambliss sat out. Sen. Purdue is now resorting to "Don't you people know when I'm joking?" which is the third-to-last refuge of the scoundrel – "You took me out of context!" being second-to-last, and, well, I imagine you all know Number One. The point is that David Perdue is not misunderstood, and he's not a fluke or a one-off; he's a latest-generation product of Georgia Republican politics. (Props to Mark Streeter, below.)


Today's toons were selected from the week's offerings at McClatchy DC, Cartoon Movement, Go Comics, Politico's Cartoon Gallery, Daryl Cagle's Political Cartoons, About.com, and other fine sources of toony goodness.


p3 Best of Show: Mike Luckovich.

p3 Legion of Merit: Mark Streeter.


Ann Telnaes recognizes the logical conclusion of the Orlando mass shooting.

And speaking of logical conclusions, Mark Fiore posted this before Trump added the Washington Post to the list of media outlets no longer credentialed for his campaign, but he anticipated a line of thought that's making the rounds today.


Tom Tomorrow dropped this eerily prescient cartoon a full six days before the Orlando shooting.

Keith Knight gets in the last word on the Cincinnati Zoo killing with the latest word on the GOP convention.

Reuben Bolling watches as Trump hedges his claims about fairness in America. (Heh. See what I did there?)

Red Meat's Bug-Eyed Earl comes out for truth in packaging.


The Comic Curmudgeon places Snuffy Smith, of all cartoons, in the running for a p3 Award for Best Adaptation from Another Medium.

Comic Strip of the Day looks at many more Orlando-themed cartoons, notes that "Extra!" was once something more than a brand of sugarless gum, and reminds us again why Bill Mauldin was little short of a cartooning god.


I'm simply furious! By request: "The Scarlet Pumpernickel," directed by Chuck Jones in 1950 from a story by Michael Maltese, comes near the beginning of Chuck Jones's transformation of Daffy Duck from woo-hooing madcap zany to a more complicated character, struggling to get the better of Bugs Bunny, or Porky Pig, or Marvin the Martian, or (sometimes, it seemed) just life. It's awfully sketchy with its history, as well as its literary descent: The Scarlet Pimpernel (it's a flower, not a bread) was written in 1905 by Baroness Emma Orczy, also known for her Golden Age mystery stories featuring The Old Man in the Corner and other characters. Other than the sword play, "Pumpernickel" has nothing to do with either the French Terror, the setting for Orczy's novel, or Alexander Dumas or the Three Musketeers, despite the gag on the cover page of Daffy's script. So there. Watch "The Scarlet Pumpernickel: at DailyMotion.


The Right-Sized Oregon Toon Block:

Ex-Oregonian Jack Ohman acknowledges Donald Trump's gradual adaptation to technology. Can't blame Trump, I suppose – the first time I ever saw a speaker with a teleprompter, I concluded it was absolutely the worst design and installation of bullet-proof shields I could imagine.

Documented Ex-Oregonian Jen Sorensen presents The Cleric and the Slo-Mo Exploding Citrus. Reminder: The cleric is the one on the left.

Matt Bors looks at America's hope for the future. First "building a better mousetrap" got replaced by "winning the lottery" as the American Dream. Now this.

Jesse Springer has his doubts about Oregon's priorities when it comes to testing in our schools.



Test your toon-captioning kung fu at The New Yorker's weekly caption-the-cartoon contest. (Rules here.) And you can browse The New Yorker's cartoon gallery here.



Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Forget about a federal Election Day holiday – go with the Oregon model

(It's primary election day in Oregon. If you haven't voted, you've got until 8pm to turn your ballot in. Postmarks don't count. And remember to sign the envelope.)


A couple of weeks ago, President Obama floated the idea of making Election Day a federal holiday, or perhaps moving it to the weekend, as a way of increasing voter participation.

Obama's idea was enthusiastically endorsed by Charlie Pierce, a fellow we like around here quite a lot:
The president just had the best idea he's ever had as president.

His determination to play all four quarters of the game he's in has led him to the obvious conclusion that national election days should be national holidays. This is like a blast of cool, fresh air in a system that's been clogged ever since John Roberts declared the Day of Jubilee. Until we re-establish voting rights for everyone as a national priority, and blow up the fiction of widespread voter fraud, which always was simply an alibi, the only alternative left is to overwhelm the polls. And the only way to do that is to make sure that people have fewer excuses to shirk their duties at the polls.

People have to get habituated to voting again. This is one easy way to do it.

If one disagrees with either of these worthies – whose hearts, let us immediately stipulate, are in the right place on this – one rolls one's own dice. But I do disagree, and pretty strongly. A federal holiday for Election Day (or moving it to the weekend) misses the point. The problem is hardly that Americans are yearning for more time to participate in the Norman Rockwellesque living tableau of exercising their freedom to vote.

Consider the status quo, where Republican-controlled statehouses, encouraged and abetted by the Roberts Court, are ever on the lookout for innovative ways – as well as tried-and-true favorites from the days of Jim Crow – to suppress voting by the wrong people, such as making them stand in line for hours at a polling place, perhaps only to find out that it had mysteriously run out of Democratic ballots, or had been deliberately understaffed, or moved to the far side of town, or closed altogether, or required some form of ID that was expensive if not completely unobtainable. And that's if they haven't had their names struck from the rolls by some bureaucratic error (always an "error;" never a "purge.")

All that a federal holiday for Election Day would accomplish is letting them draw holiday pay for the experience, rather than having to take the day off on their own nickle. I suppose that's an improvement, but not much of one. It certainly doesn't do anything to get at the basic problem, which is that one of our two political parties has vote suppression baked into its basic electoral strategy.

Here is how it's done in Oregon (and in the interview linked to above, Obama does mention Oregon – once):

First, you're automatically registered as a voter when you apply for or renew your Oregon driver's license, unless you specifically opt out. By default you'll be registered as a non-affiliated voter, but you'll get a card in the mail allowing you to declare a party preference within 21 days. (All of these choices can be reversed or changed later.)

But the purpose of the motor voter law and online voter registration is simply to make one more route to registration available. It's not that you have to have a driver's licence to vote in Oregon, it's that if you're getting a license anyway you get brought into the system automatically. If you register by mail or in person at the local county elections office, you can use a current driver's license or an expired license, or a utility bill, a bank statement, a paycheck stub, or a couple of other forms of acceptable ID.

At any time after you register, you can verify your registration online.

Then, about three or four weeks before the next election, you'll receive a copy of the Oregon Voters Guide in the mail from the Secretary of State's office. It's also available online.

And about a week later, you'll get your mail-in ballot. All you have to do is complete it, sign the inner security envelope it goes in, and mail it back or drop it off at a local ballot drop-off point. (I traditionally go to my local public library, about five or six blocks from here.) You can wait until the last moment to drop off your ballot, but if you mail it, it has to arrive at the elections office by 8pm on election Tuesday (postmarks don't count), so you need to put it in the mail by Friday or Saturday to be sure.

That's it. You can also check online to make sure your ballot has been received. (They got mine on the 4th.)

At worst, you may have to make a trip to your local library for an online connection, or hook a ride to the county elections office, but that's it. You certainly won't have to stand in line in for hours or jump through ridiculous administrative hoops to provide documentation.

Is Oregon's system perfected? Nope.

If you don't have easy access to the internet, or readily available transportation, you've still got a couple of hurdles to get over to register and vote. Not usually insurmountable hurdles, but hurdles all the same.

Some Oregon voters got left out of this month's primary because they never returned the card stating their party preference, or returned it too late.

And as an election observer, I've watched fellow observers from the other party try to game the system by challenging signatures that were Hispanic names. (The mechanics are that ballots come in, a worker scans the bar code on the outer envelope and compares the signature on the envelope to the digital image they have on file; the scan also records the ballot receipt in the registry database so that you can't submit more than one ballot. If they don't match or there's no signature, the ballot is pulled for review. If they match, the safety envelopes are sorted by precinct and stored until the polls close.* In the case of those over-eager anti-Hispanic observers, who were leaning over the shoulders of the workers the better to interfere, a call from the lawyers the county Democrats had on tap that day put an end to their harassment.)

And two right-wing PACs appear to behind the forged election materials purporting to be from the Secretary of State's office in a local race.

And finally – this one I'm not quite sure what to make of yet – while Oregon's system has added tens of thousands of new voters since motor voter came online in January, as of last Friday only 25% of Oregonians had cast their ballots. (Interestingly, the last time Oregon saw a surge in new-voter registration, it was in 2008, driven in large part by DNC chair Howard Dean's "fifty state strategy." Once Obama was in office, of course, Dean was replaced and his strategy followed him out the door.) So while I don't think Americans are longing for the pagentry of filling out their ballot behind the curtain at the local grade school, there's the argument to be made that voters don't seem to be terribly motivated. And there are a lot of possible reasons for that; I just don't think that not getting the day off to vote is one of them. If it turned out that registered voters aren't motivated to participate in a system that already makes voting only a little harder than ordering a book from Amazon, it's not immediately clear why they would use a paid holiday to go to the polls, instead of simply taking the day off.

So there's room for improvement. But note that none of these problems would be affected in any way by making Election Day a federal holiday. 

A friend in Indiana sent me this description of his voting experience earlier this month:
In Indiana you can vote for either party in the primary but you must declare which ballot you want to get. I "early" voted last Friday to avoid the lines today, and I had to go to either the Payless Grocery store or the Board of Elections. I chose the Board of Elections. I drove through three construction zones, parked on the city street, walked six blocks, and found myself in the belly of the former J.C. Penney building now converted to a county government office. Up three flights and into an office – where there were two workers and not a single other would-be voter. Wonder why.

I asked for a Democrat ballot and I may have imagined it but I swear to you the young woman working there gave it a sort of mildly confused "humpf" in the "well I'll be damned" spirit. I felt like it was one of those "I must have some of that here somewhere....let me look...oh, yes, here it is..." Perhaps I read too much into her shuffling of papers and voting cards.

I had to present a "photo I.D." approved by the state. I had to orally confirm my birth date. I had to sign a book that confirmed my address. I had to sign my name on a screen and she compared it to the signature in the book, which I had just signed five seconds before. I had to orally confirm my address. I had to sign that I wanted a Democrat ballot.

She programmed the thingy, I put it in the machine, and there were only two races that were contested. That's right: the Democrats had managed to get only two offices (that includes Bernie and Hillary) for which voting choice could be exercised. (Republicans will win both of those in the general election, so I get the reluctance to play the game). Voting did not take long.
So I get it: Even for someone as smart as my friend, and with the resources to work the system correctly that he has, the act of voting – and not just voting in Indiana – is often a dispiriting undertaking. It can take a certain amount of bloody-mindedness even to bother. I don't see how moving his experience to a Saturday would help that.

And likewise, a federal holiday wouldn't do anything to prevent the determined gaming of the system by Republican legislatures, who start by making it harder for the wrong people to register, continue by removing any certainty that once they're registered they'll stay registered, and finish up by making it needlessly difficult to turn in their ballot and uncertain it's getting counted.

At each of those points along the way, Oregon has made registering and voting easier and more accessible. And the ballots are secure, meaning that the right-wing canard about voter fraud is not a plausible objection.

So my advice to President Obama is to forget the federal election holiday plan, if that was ever anything more than blue-skying on his part, and throw his weight behind voting by mail and motor-voter laws.

As readers of this blog know, I've lost patience on more than one occasion with Ron Wyden, but our senior Senator is right on the money here.
“My home state of Oregon has led the nation in making voting more accessible. No one has to take time off work just to exercise his or her constitutional rights,” Wyden said. “My proposition is the rest of our country should follow Oregon’s lead and offer all voters a chance to vote by mail.” [...] “Across the country, there are stories of long lines, inexplicable purges of voter rolls and new requirements that make it harder for citizens to vote. There is no excuse for accepting this state of affairs,” Wyden said. “There is no excuse for citizens in Arizona to wait five hours to cast their ballot. There is no excuse for citizens in Rhode Island to find two out of every three polling places have closed. There is no excuse whatsoever for poor communities and minority communities across this country to see their polling places shuttered.”

Of course, the party that is bringing us back the glory days of Jim Crow will fight this hammer and tong; after all, if you make it easier for the wrong people vote, the next thing that's bound to happen is that they'll be out there voting for the wrong things. But if we're going to have a knock-down-drag-out fight, let's at least have a fight over a proposal that would actually change things for the better.

____________

*Tip of the p3 hat to Ron Morgan of the Washington County Democrats office for walking me through the ballot-handling procedure, which I haven't witnessed first-hand in some time.)

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Sunday morning toons: What ever became of . . . ?


There are other stories this week than the story that everyone predicted but no one saw coming – the all-but-settled coronation of Donald Trump as the GOP's once and future candidate – but they're tough to find. As so often with stories that suck the creative oxygen out of things, the embarrassment of riches presented by the ascendancy of the Slo-Mo Exploding Citrus, has left us short on the riches and somewhat longer on the embarrassment. You'd think that a story that's been eight months in the obvious making would give time for some more creative responses. Ah well.

I enjoyed Jeff Danziger's sidelight, below, which has a nice Tom Lehrer vibe to it.

It was an on-again, off-again week for cartoonists. Turkish President Edrogan took exception to being compared to an ape – as did, one might surmise, apes. Iranian political cartoonist Atena Farghadani was freed, while Iowa small-market cartoonist Rick Friday was fired – and gained a much larger readership in the process. Check out Comic Strip of the Day, below, for more.

And, again, for the next week or two I'm keeping my distance from my friends in Oregon Democratic politics, who insist that every primary must be an excuse to get in touch with their inner Heathers. There are still people out there with Party Unity My Ass bumper stickers from the Obama – Clinton battle of 2008, and others holding a grudge about how somebody voted in the Novick – Merkley Senate primary from the same year.

And finally, no – the GOP is not dead just because they nominated someone who has never held office and has no real connection to the party other than limited understanding, anger, and money. It's doing fine at the state level – and will continue to do so at least until after the 2020 census.

Today's toons were selected despite the concerted efforts of GOP establishment insiders fearing for their phoney-baloney jobs from the week's offerings at McClatchy DC, Cartoon Movement, Go Comics, Politico's Cartoon Gallery, Daryl Cagle's Political Cartoons, About.com, and other fine sources of toony goodness.


p3 Best of Show: Jeff Danziger.

p3 Legion of Merit: Jim Morin.

p3 Croix de Guerre (with Golf Shoes): Milt Priggee.

p3 "It's Not Just a River in Egypt" Medal: Matt Davies.

p3 Award for Best Adaptation from Another Medium: Pat Bagley and Bill Bramhall.

Ann Telnaes wonders if Trump can clean up his act for the general election. Nah.

Mark Fiore tells the story of the common man's billionaire in one minute and nine seconds.


For those Americans who are envious of Doctor Who's meddling in all of British history, Tom Tomorrow puts the last twelve months in their proper trans-temporal context. Be grateful for what you have.

Keith Knight raises a good question: Why is Zoe Saldina, the go-to actress for exotic characters – being cast as Nina Simone? It parallels the apocryphal objection that, if we really must put Harriet Tubman on a twenty-dollar bill, can't we at least agree to use an image of her that makes her conventionally pretty? I mean, come on.

Reuben Bolling discharges an unfortunate duty.

Red Meat's Bug-Eyed Earl wonders what the world is coming to.


Cinco de Mayo is a pretty lame-ass idea for a holiday to begin with but, as The Comic Curmudgeon points out, it's possible for one of my sentimental favorite strips to make it just a little bit worse.

Comic Strip of the Day celebrates the triumph of, among other things like the Visigoths, two well-known political cartoonists – well-known if you spend more time off the comics page of your local daily – who shared the 2016 International Editorial Cartoons Prize from the Cartooning for Peace Swiss Foundation.


But they're not "gay" anymore! As long as we're acknowledging the ways in which America misremembers Mexican history and culture this week, let's look at an excerpt from one of Disney's famous efforts to support some of the less-attractive aspects American foreign policy. "The Three Caballeros" was a feature film produced by Disney in 1944, and features the work of several p3 semi-regulars, including Clarence Nash (Donald Duck), Sterling Holloway, and Pinto Colvig.



The More or Less Right-Sized Oregon Toon Block:

Ex-Oregonian Jack Ohman presents his Grand Unified Trump Conspiracy Theory.

Documented Ex-Oregonian Jen Sorensen examines the womb whistle and its natural enemies.

Matt Bors worries, and perhaps righty so, when the jokes write themselves.

Jesse Springer has, in my memory, done only two caricatures: Governor John Kitzhaber (which was pretty good), and Kitz's 2010 GOP rival Chris Dudley, who appeared only as a pair of long legs that extended up out of the frame. (Go here, for example.) But he's making another shot at it with the presence of the Slo-Mo Exploding Citrus in the Pacific Northwest this week. I suppose one could quibble – Is that the direction that his bizarre combover goes? And of course, his hands do look a little big. – but the image works for me, and the punchline is outstanding.



Test your toon-captioning superpowers at The New Yorker's weekly caption-the-cartoon contest. (Rules here.) And you can browse The New Yorker's cartoon gallery here.