It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.

Pity Ted Stevens. The Alaska Senator is facing federal indictment for, among other things, making false statements to federal investigators, routing federal earmark money to cronies, and corrupt practices involving several Alaska businesses.

Understand, though: The problem isn't the federal investigations, as such--Stevens is one of those archetypal Republicans of the contemporary mold, for whom an indictment is somewhere between a rite of passage, a badge of honor, and a simple cost of doing business.

The problem is that people from his home state won't stop asking him questions about it. As if it's any of their business.

In a classic moment from an appearance on Alaska Talk Radio this week, an increasingly irritated Stevens--the man who made "bridge to nowhere" synonymous with wasteful and probably corrupt government spending projects--finally said this to one caller who persisted with questions about whether Stevens would accept a presidential pardon:

Why would I cross a bridge I haven’t seen? I don’t know. I don’t know the answer to that question.

A poor but honest choice of words, Senator.

Hm. Let's review: A mean-tempered old fellow, up there in the cold and snow for fifty-some years, snarling down at the little people below, hatching wonderful, awful ideas . . . could it be?

Yes, it's official: We've got another Separated at Birth!





(Image sources: Stevens, the Grinch)