Thursday, April 9, 2009

The unforgiving minute

Men's underwear dropping, accompanied by a prescient, forward impression?

Does anyone else find that this--

"If you look at sales of male underpants it's just pretty much a flat line, it hardly ever changes," [NPR's Robert] Krulwich recounted after the publishing of [former Fed Reserve chair Alan] Greenspan's book, "The Age Of Turbulence." "But on those few occasions where it dips that means that men are so pinched that they are deciding not to replace underpants. And [Greenspan] said 'that is almost always a prescient, forward impression that here comes trouble.'"

Well, here comes trouble.

A revised survey by the leading global research company, Mintel, shows relatively large drops in the sales of men's underwear in the United States.

--sounds an awful lot like this:

And now the Stock Market Report by Exchange Telegraph

Trading was crisp at the start of the day with some brisk business on the floor. Rubber hardened and string remained confident. Little bits of tin consolidated although biscuits sank after an early gain and stools remained anonymous. Armpits rallied well after a poor start. Nipples rose dramatically during the morning but had declined by mid-afternoon, while teeth clenched and buttocks remained firm. Small dark furry things increased severely on the floor, whilst rude jellies wobbled up and down, and bounced against rising thighs which had spread to all parts of the country by mid-afternoon.

And to think they call economics "the dismal science."

Minute's up.

1 comment:

The Chinuk said...

That sounds pretty bad. Anyone hear how the New York Sock Exchange fared today?