Sunday, November 23, 2008

Reprise: The Jack Bauer "24" Drinking Game

Middle-eastern terrorists and Latin American drug lords couldn't stop Jack Bauer. National security bureaucrats couldn't stop him. An evil President, with all of the resources at his disposal, couldn’t stop him. Even his treacherous ex-partner (and ex-lover) Nina Myers--who once killed a man with half a credit card--couldn't stop him.

He's been shot, knifed, tortured, arrested, betrayed, and beaten more times than you could count. He's been near ground zero for at least two nuclear detonations, he's been exposed to a lethal plague-like virus, and he once had to quit heroin cold-turkey while he was chasing down terrorists in LA. He chopped off his daughter's fiancée's hand with a fire axe in the name of national security--and kept on going. He was subjected to "extraordinary rendition" to a Chinese prison where he was tortured for two years (without breaking, his inquisitor later admitted with grudging admiration).

Everyone once close to him is either completely estranged from him, or plain dead--except his stalwart CTU ally Chloe, who's pregnant with the insufferable Morris's baby, which is arguably worse

Jack was tougher than anything--anything!--that the show's writers could throw at him. Which makes it a little ironic that it took last year's Writer's Guild strike to put Jack out of the game for almost 18 months.

Tonight he starts his comeback: "24: Redemption" gets a self-contained two hours to fill in the narrative gaps between the cold dawn a year and a half ago when he stood on a cliff over the Pacific, evidently deciding whether to jump, and the start-up of the full real-time episode season in January.

In honor of Jack's snarling, hissing, psychotic return tonight, we are proud to resurrect the p3 Jack Bauer "24" Drinking Game:

Jack hisses "Damn it!" - sip.
Jack snarls "Sonofabitch!" - drink.
Jack rasps "Right now he's our only lead." - chug.

Enjoy responsibly.

1 comment:

Carla said...

In your honor Bill: I'll have my spiked hot chocolate at the ready.