Think of it as "Environmental catastrophe with a happy face"

The movement conservatives are finally warming to the idea of global climate change. In fact, they've found an up-side:

Melting polar ice will mean that oil reserves under the Arctic--heretofore jealously guarded by polar bears--will be easier to get to.

According to FOX News--so, you know, it's reliable--melting polar ice will make "a full 25 percent of the world’s undiscovered oil reserves." available for extraction harvesting. (Wait--if it's undiscovered, how do we know that it amounts to 25 percent of . . . oh, never mind.)

So the bright side is, if we all drive our cars more, we'll accelerate climate change, which will further raise the temperature in the arctic, which means there'll be more oil available, so we'll be able to drive our cars more, which will accelerate climate change. It's perfect.